__ + diamonds + _

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

sick.
sick of alot of things.

went out with sis, Xuande and Tiong Phew.
it's been a very long time since i last met them.
well, it's a fun fun day.

collected new house keys today. visited new house.
it's UNEXPECTEDLY SMALL.
i think HDB cheated us by showing us all the very big floor plans. lol. but i guess it'll be a cosy place.
cant wait to move in, only after renovations.
should be around chinese new year.
mum is like dun even have money for renovations now.
very sick... how the hell did we managed ourselves to such a terrible state?

I'm not blaming her. it's not her fault.
sometimes juz wish that we had never decide to move in the 1st place. maybe let us tio some TOTO or 4D please, to clear all our shits. i can't even help. sick.........

situation makes people change.
i do not use to see much with monetary terms.
but things are not the same anymore.
reality crashing to the floor.
we have to face it.

someone once told me that as i grow, lot's of problems will falls onto me. it's my life he's talking about. dunno how he knows, but i now think it's true.
the child in me was gone, bringing away my naiveness.
not believing that things are always so simple now.
it's time to grow. but somehow i dun feel wanting to.
what can i do?

i wan to give myself a week's break, but in other hand, i think it's not too appropriate.
i wan the break badly la............
should i ?

yes, when can i stop working?

work problems, family problems, life problems.

can u imagine getting home from work, ur mouth hardly opens and speaks to anybody until the time u got to bed and fell asleep. the same routine everyday.
there's something which makes me very irritated whenever the moment i got home.
and weird, there's no one i can talk to.
dun even know where and how to start.

then i remember i learnt something from Jieying.
that only the good things are shown, bad ones are always kept unknown. i never realise this until she mentioned this one day after she quarrelled with her bf. so there's no one who actually knows what is happening around me after all.

i dunno how to say about these anymore.
i wish that all problems will find it's solutions soon.
i really wish......

We don't want to hurt you, Mummy.
Realised how much I loved you when I do not want you to be hurt.

Sparkling Diamond
[2:17 AM]